So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
