How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
