you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
