I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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