Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Randomize