at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
