I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Randomize
