And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
