i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
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