Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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