you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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