so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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