Only a mothe r could love this liver
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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