shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
