He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Randomize