Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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