I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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