Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
