Swine flu. Run for my life!
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
