I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
