Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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