i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Randomize
