I wannas sexs uuuuu
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
