Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
