Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize