Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
