Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Just pee around me
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize