are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
