too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
You're a waste of cheezeits
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
