I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Randomize
