we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
