Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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