Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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