I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
