You're earring is so big in my mouth
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
