we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
