A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
