the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
love makes seman taste better
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Randomize
