the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
