Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
