what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
