I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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