i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize