We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Randomize