I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
