When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Randomize
