We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
