oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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