She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Randomize