it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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