Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
